Going forward

Over the last week I have either sat down to write on my BLOG or at least thought about it but my mind just seemed to be blank.
　
I have slept in, rested, read, caught up with family and friends and generally relaxed. Am I felling recharged? No. I was so looking forward to this break away from the everyday.
　
Not having to go to work and wake up with the alarm every morning. That part I have enjoyed.
　
Catching up with family and friends, yes that part I have enjoyed.
　
What I think of as relaxing, yes I’m enjoying that part as well.
　
So why am I feeling more tired, tense, less enthusiastic and generally out of sorts?
　
Don't get me wrong I am grateful for all I have. I love my peace and quiet and time to reflect but am guilty of negative inner dialogue. I am blessed to have a very supportive and loving circle of family and friends however positive reinforcement from those around me does not stop those negative thoughts.
　
I have been challenged with my weight and fitness for many years. In my head I know I have to watch what I eat and exercise more and have tried many times to stick to sensible eating and exercise plans. My heart or inner self does not seem to get it. I hate the word diet as for me (and I’m sure many others) it has very negative connotations. My diet is exactly what I eat not some plan where I have to have a pantry full of legumes and dry crackers that I eat only once a week. Have you ever noticed how most diet plans have a different thing for breakfast lunch dinner and snacks for 7 – 14 days? Bloody ridiculous and impractical as you end up with all this rubbish going stale in the pantry and becoming science experiments in the fridge. Bring back the simplicity I say.
　
Perhaps a change of focus may help. Forget the eating plan. Maybe it’s time to really look at what will soothe, inspire and revive ME!
　
Time to start looking for things that really soothe me so I can sleep contentedly at night.
　
Time to look for inspiration so I can embrace each new experience with gusto.
　
Time to find the key to being revived so the circle of me is complete. Then I can put a lot more into the rest of the world. As my daughter told me recently: ‘Live the life you love and you’ll love the life you live’.  Maybe then my heart will get it.
　
How will this pan out? I don’t know but maybe the first step of putting it down in writing for others to read is the start.